I have a stummyache. I ate too much.

(dinner time)

Alex (looking at his own reflection in his spoon): Where’d Alex’s head go?
Alex: Where’d my head go?

Claire (looking at her spoon): Where’d my head go? Where’d my head go? Where’d my head go?

Alex: Daddy, when I’m big, when I'm growing, I can have big feet when I’m a daddy!
Daddy: Yeah.
Alex: And wear big shoes.

Daddy: Alex, would you rather have three hands or three feet?
Alex: Two hands.
Daddy: But if you had to choose one or the other, would you rather have three hands or three feet?
Alex: Three feet and four feet.
Daddy: Why?
Alex: Because I have A LOT OF FEET!!

(Alex sings some nonsense words.)
Alex: That's the cucumber song.
Daddy: That’s the cucumber song?
Alex: Let's sing the strawberry song.
Daddy: Okay.
Alex: Strawberries… strawberries… strawberries all day long.

(Claire, standing, leans over and puts her head on the floor. Her shirt hangs down and blocks her view.)
Claire (crying): I can't see, Mommy! I can't see.
(Mommy fixes Claire’s shirt so she can see.)

Alex: That’s like if you go over a hill. Claire’s a hill.

Alex: Can I have more oranges?
Daddy: No, no more oranges. But you can have anything else.
Alex (smiling): I want some handprints, Daddy. I want some handprints.
Daddy: You want some handprints?
Alex: Yeah.
Daddy: Okay.
(Daddy pretends to take a set of handprints off the wall and give it to Alex.)
Alex: Thanks. Now you can have a million dollars.
(Alex pretends to give a million dollars to Daddy.)
Daddy: Thanks.


(Claire is sitting on the potty.)
Alex: Did Claire poop yet, Mommy?!
Mommy: No, not yet.
Alex: I'm gonna get her a book!


Alex: I have a stummyache. I ate too much.


Alex: Will you do me a favor, Mommy? Will you give me a million dollars so I can fix the TV?


(Alex and Claire are combing Mommy’s hair.)

Alex: Mommy, you’re at the barber shop.

Alex: Keep going straight, Claire.
Claire: Okay.

Alex: Does that look cute, Mom? Does that look cute, Mom, Claire? Does that look cute?