But you can't grow up like a sheep. How can you grow up like a sheep?

(Claire is talking in her sleep, during a bad dream.)
Claire (upset): I want my waffle back! I want my waffle back!

(Daddy wakes up Claire.)
Claire (upset): I want my waffle back.
Daddy: You want your waffle back?
Claire: Yeah.
Daddy: Who took your waffle?
Claire: Ah-yah.


(Claire says her usual as she walks down the stairs.)
Claire: Part of the railing.
Daddy: Yeah.
Claire: More part of the railing down there.
Daddy: Yeah.

Alex: I don’t wanna go to school. I don’t wanna go to school.
Daddy: But you like school. If you don’t go today you won’t get to go for a long time.
Alex: I don’t wanna go there because I love you.
Daddy: Because you love me?
Alex: Yeah.
Alex: That’s why I don’t wanna go to school.


Alex: I ate cheese pizza.
Daddy: Yummy!
Claire: I ate pizza at ‘chool.
Daddy: You ate pizza too?
Claire (very enthusiastically): I like pizza! I like applesauce! And geen beans!


Claire (handing Daddy his Blackberry): Here you go, Daddy. Here go. Here your – Blackberry.

Claire: I waiting! I waiting! I waiting!


(Claire notices Daddy’s yard shoes, which he wears to mow the lawn.)
Claire: That’s your – mawmower – mawmower shoes.
Daddy: That’s right! How’d you know that?
Claire: That’s your mawmower shoes.


(Daddy is dialing Mommy on the speakerphone.)
Alex: Who’s that?
Daddy: It’s Mommy if she picks up.
Claire: Uh see – uh hello to Mommy.
(The phone starts ringing on the other end.)
Claire: Hi Mommy!

(Mommy is on the phone.)
Claire : Hi uh go to work, Mommy, uh go to work?
Mommy: Yeah, I’m at work.
Alex: Bye!
Mommy: ‘Kay, but I’m coming home right now.
Alex: ‘Kay.
Mommy: ‘Kay.
Alex: See you later!
Mommy: Okay, bye!
Claire: Bye! Bye Mommy!
Mommy: Bye, Claire. Bye, Alex.
Alex: Bye.

(Daddy’s hair is wet.)
Claire: Your head – your head – your head, is, black!
Daddy: My head’s black?
Claire: Yeah!

(Claire is removing her socks.)
Claire: Look. Uh pull, over heel! Uh pull over heel, Daddy!
(Claire pulls her sock over her heel and off.)
Daddy: Yay Claire, you did it!


Claire: Beach house – beach house – beach house in three minutes.
Daddy: Beach house in three minutes?
Claire: Yeah.
Daddy: No, we’re not going today.
Claire: Why?

Claire: Uh go beach house – uh go beach house, now. Uh go beach house, now.
Daddy: You wanna go to the beach house now?
Claire: Yeah.
Daddy: No, we’re not going yet. We have to pack first, and we’re going tomorrow.
Claire: Why?

(Claire brings Daddy a cupcake.)
Claire: That yours. Here go, Daddy, that yours. It yummy, Daddy. It yummy.
Daddy: Thank you, Claire!

(Claire brings Daddy another cupcake.)
Claire: It yummy. It yummy.
Daddy: Mmm, it is yummy!

Alex: I want a cupcake, Claire!
Claire: No, dat all the cupcakes. Dat all.

Alex: Claire. You’re a monster.
Claire (crying): No, I not a monster!
Daddy: You’re not a monster, Claire.

(Alex is using the DVD remote as a magic wand.)
Alex: Abracadabra! Go away, Claire.
(Claire runs into the other room.)
Alex: Abracadabra! Claire come back.
(Claire runs back.)
Alex: Abracadabra! Claire go away.
(Claire runs into the other room.)
Alex: Abracadabra! Claire come back.
(Claire runs back.)

(Alex gives the DVD remote to Claire.)
Alex: Can you use this, Claire, to make me go away?

Claire: Go! Go away!
Alex: No, say Abracadabra.
Claire: Abbadabba!
Alex: And then, when I come back, you need to say Abacadabra too.
(Alex runs off.)
Claire: Come back! Abbadabba come back!
(Alex runs back.)

Alex: Abracadabra! Claire go away.
(Claire runs into the other room.)
Alex: Claire! Please come back! Abracadabra, Claire come back.
(Claire runs back.)

Claire: Abbadabba! Go away, Daddy.
(Daddy runs into the other room. Claire follows.)
Alex: No Claire! You’re not supposed to go away.
Alex (to Daddy): Claire’s not doing it right.

Alex: Abracadabra! Claire go away.
(Claire runs into the other room.)
Alex: Abracadabra! Daddy go away.
(Daddy runs into the other room. Claire laughs hysterically.)

Alex: Let’s go shopping, Claire.

(Mommy comes home from work.)
Alex: Mommy’s here! Mommy’s here! Mommy’s here! Mommy’s here!
Claire (to Mommy): I play shopping!

Claire: Mommy home, Daddy. Mommy home.


Alex (singing): I’m gonna go to the beach...
Alex (singing): On, Saturday, not on Friday…
Alex (singing): But I really wanna go to the beeeach


Alex: I really wanna go to the beach.
Daddy: I know you do.


(dinner)

Alex's English muffin: Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi.
Alex: Claire, can you -- can your English muffin say "hi"?

Alex: Claire, you're a boy!
(Alex laughs.)
Claire: I not a boy. I Claire!
Alex: Claire, do you know what people are?
Alex: Some people are boys, and some people are girls. So you're a girl.
Claire: Yeah!

Claire: Watch, Mommy. Go – beach – af – ter – lunch.
Claire: Watch, Daddy. Go – beach – af – ter – lunch.
Daddy: Yeah.

Alex: I wanna be a sheep when I grow up.
Daddy: A sheep?
Alex: Yeah. And a daddy. A daddy sheep.

Alex: But you can't grow up like a sheep. How can you grow up like a sheep? You can't grow up like different things.
Daddy: That’s right.

Daddy: Claire, did you express yourself at school?
Claire: No. I had (mumble) and green beans and peaches.
Alex: And what else?
(Claire doesn't respond.)
Alex: What else did you have, Claire?
(Claire doesn't respond.)
Daddy: Did you have snack?
Claire: Yeah, snack.
Alex: Do you want to know what I had today? I'm gonna tell you.
Alex: First, I had fresh fruit, and, a graham cracker.
Daddy: Okay.
Alex: And I had green beans, pizza, and… I don't know what the other one was. Probably something. But I don't know what it was.