Kirk's not a pilgrim. But he used to be one.

(Mommy and Daddy are driving Alex and Claire to their surprise activity: the Santa Train to Colonial Williamsburg. On the way there, Alex and Claire try to guess what the surprise is.)

Claire: The beach house!

Alex: Apple picking!

Claire: Peach picking!

Claire: Pear picking!

Alex: No picking.

Claire: Going to school!

Alex: Don't guess church.
Claire: Church!

Mommy: We're gonna see somebody really special.
Claire: Nana and Pop!

Claire: Grandma and Grandpa!

Alex: Santa!


Claire: I saw chopping down trees.
Claire: Surprise! We're gonna go chopping down trees!


Alex (to Claire): People don't ride on freight trains, they ride on express trains.

Alex: Freight trains carry coal and milk. And other stuff.


Alex: Daddy, if we get cold on the train, there's hot chocolate in one of the cars.



(on the train)

Claire (reading the train magazine): I look like a daddy. I'm a daddy.


(The kids tell Santa what they want for Christmas.)
Claire: A doll with purple and pink and green on it.

Alex: A dinosaur.

(Santa asks Alex if he wants anything else.)
Alex: A handkerchief.


(Santa and Mrs. Claus sing Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer.)
Alex: Daddy, you should forget that song.
Daddy: What?
Alex: You should forget that song, because that's part of my surprise.
Daddy: Oh, okay. I already forgot it.
Alex: Good.



Alex: But the pilgrims died. Except for Kirk. Kirk's not a pilgrim. But he used to be one.



(back on the train again)
Claire: It's like a airplane, 'cause, there's windows.
Mommy: That's right.
Claire: But it's not really a airplane.
Mommy: That's right.



(Alex puts his pen behind his ear.)
Alex (smiling): I'm Handy Manny.


(Crossing the train aisle, Alex trips and falls on Daddy's shoe. He isn't hurt.)
Alex: Santa saw that. He saw you hit me.
Daddy: I didn't hit you!
Alex: Well, with your shoe you did.



Alex: Daddy, do you wanna count to one hundred with me?
Daddy: Yeah.



Alex: All there is is just one, little, hallway.
Alex: I wanna go see a different car.
Daddy: They all look the same.
Alex: No caboose?
Daddy: That’s right.
Alex: Every train has a caboose. But some trains -- some trains, have gas. Excuse me.
Daddy: Did you have gas?
Alex: For real I did.


Alex: Thank you for the surprise, Mommy.

Claire: A Christmas tree on top of the building?! That's funny.

Claire: That was fun.
Mommy: Good. But it was tiring, wasn't it?
Claire: It was so long.


Alex: The Berenstain Bears are greedy.
Mommy: What?
Alex: The Berenstain Bears are greedy.
Mommy: They're greedy?
Alex: Yeah.
Mommy: Oh.
Alex: You know why?
Mommy: Why?
Alex: Because they want everything at the store. Like candy. And stickers.


Claire: How do you make a light, for the cars to go and stop? And go slow.

Claire: Why's the lines there?
Alex: So, if you get in the middle of it? You will get a ticket from the policeman.


Claire: I want some stuff outside too.
Alex: That's what I said.