It's not working! I pushed the button.

(Daddy picks up Alex from school. Alex has just washed his hands, but as he holds Daddy’s hand, he comments on how his hands are still a little wet.)
Alex: I just got one paper towel. If you get too many, a tree – they have to cut down a tree, to make more paper towels.



Alex: Why do people need stop signs?



Claire: Alex, I love trains. Trains are my favorite, uh… toy.



(Claire and Alex are doing a jigsaw puzzle together, and Claire repeatedly impresses Alex with her jigsaw skills.)
Alex: Claire is so good at doing puzzles, Daddy.



(Alex and Claire are pretending to be Daddy and Mommy, working on their computers -- which consist of a book (open and turned sideways) and a Matchbox car for a mouse.)

Alex (acting frustrated with his computer): It's not working! I pushed the button.

Alex: Claire, we need a mouse.

Alex: We need a cord. You know how Daddy has a cord?

Claire: Alex, can you be quiet 'cause I'm gonna do a meeting, okay?
Claire (with a pretend phone): Hello?
Alex: Hello. No, uh -- uh sorry. I didn't mean to. 'Cause you're not talking to me.
Claire (into the phone): Hello?
Claire: Uh. Who's there?
Claire: Uh, do you need a new computer?
Claire: Um.
(Claire walks into the hallway.)
(Claire says something inaudible.)
Claire: No, I - I done with my work. I don't have any work today. So, I'm gonna go to work at the building, so I'm gonna go (inaudible) to get some food, so I'm gonna go to the store to get some (inaudible) french fries. Bye!

(Claire returns to the family room.)
Claire: I'm done with my meeting.

Alex: Look Daddy, I made my cord!
Daddy: Yeah! Good!
Alex: Now, my computer will work. Right, computer?
(Alex laughs.)
(Alex sighs audibly.)
Alex (dejectedly): I have to do all this work.

Alex: Well, grown-ups sometimes Claire, we have to be loud, and go on in our room. Okay?
Alex: I'm gonna go in my room, you be loud while I'm doing my meeting, and still be loud, because I'm over here and it'll still be loud, so I want you to stop when I'm over here, okay?

Claire: Okay.
Alex (on the phone): Hi!
Claire: Hi. Oh, sorry.
Alex (to Claire): Can you be loud when I do it -- the whole thing?
Claire (loudly): Hello! Who's there!
Alex (on the phone): Uh-huh. Yeah, of course.
Claire (loudly): Hello who's there!!
Alex (to Claire): Stop doing it now Claire because I'm in my room.
Claire: Okay.
(Alex mumbles into the phone.)
Alex (on the phone): Yeah, of course I am!
Alex (on the phone): Yeah I'm doing a lot of my work. That's why I said of course I am.
Alex (on the phone, laughing): Yeah.
Claire (on the phone): Yeah, it's not right because, I'm not there yet.
Alex (to Daddy): Daddy? What do you -- what do you say on your meetings?
Daddy: Um… I just talk to the people on the phone about my work.
Alex: How -- how do you explain about your work?
Daddy: Um, I tell them about the numbers... and the work I need to do.

Claire (on the phone again): After we -- our kids go to school, we're gonna go to work, we're gonna go to a building, and that's gonna be our work, okay? Bye!

Alex (on the phone again): I count loooots of numbers, on my knee. I say "one two three". And I write lots of (mumble) to my work. But this time I didn't write one to you, I wrote one to --

Alex (to Daddy): What do you call Mommy?
Daddy: Um, Steph.
Alex: Do you call her Sweetie sometimes?
Daddy: Yes.
Alex (on the phone again): Um, my, Sweetie. At work.
Alex (on the phone): Yes. Yeah, I need to go to sleep now. Bye.

(Now Alex pretends to sleep on the couch, and Claire pretends to wake him up.)
Alex: Claire! Um, Alex, no. It's way too early, it's five. You've gotta go back to sleep.
Claire: Okay.
Alex: I'll come and check on you in a while.
Claire: When it's time to wake up, I have -- I have to go to Chick Fil-A.
Alex: Okay Mom. Okay Mom.
Claire: Is it time to wake up?
Alex: No, not yet, Alex!
Claire: But I'm the mom.
Alex: But you -- a kid is a boy… or a girl.
Claire: I'm the girl, so -- I'm the mom, but a --
Alex: No you have to be -- I can't explain. A kid is a boy, who is… playing. It's not a person who works. It's a person who plays! Can you guess who it is?

Claire: Kid!
Alex: Yes. A kid, is somebody, who plays. And that doesn't mean that you're a grown-up, Claire.
Alex: Let's wake up now, Mom!
Claire: And I'll go to Chick Fil-A, okay? I need to go to Chick Fil-A.
Alex: You forgot to exercise!
Claire: Yeah I need to go upstairs and do exercise.
(Claire walks into the kitchen.)
Alex: Okay, but -- that's not the way upstairs, that's not --
Claire: It is, these are the stairs.
Claire: I'm exercising!
(Claire laughs.)
(Alex joins her in the kitchen.)
Alex (raising his arms up and down): You do it like this, Claire. You do it like this.
Claire: Oh, that's exercise.
(Claire repeats Alex's motions.)
Claire: And this is how you exercise.
(Claire tenses her muscles.)
Alex: Oh, but Claire, you're s'posed to take a shower after, okay?
Claire: Okay. Now I do a shower! Upstairs, okay?
Alex: Okay. I'll show you how to do a shower. Here's the shower door.
(Alex goes into the pantry.)
Alex: Here's how you turn it on.
Claire: Can I do that? Can I do that?
Alex: And, then Claire, you pretend -- pssssh, pssssh -- it's um, dripping on your head.
Claire: Pssssh, psssssh.
Alex: No um -- turn the knob.
Claire: I am turning the knob. Now um turn the shower.
Alex: You wanna get water on the floor?
Claire: I'm done with my shower!
Alex: All right!
Claire: Now I'm gonna go to Chick Fil-A, okay?
Alex: Okay.
Claire: You're gonna be the boy, okay?
Alex: Okay. You forgot -- no I'm not the boy, I'm the daddy. But Claire, you forgot to eat your breakfast!
(Claire runs off, laughing.)
Alex (chasing Claire): You forgot to eat your breakfast! You forgot to eat your breakfast!
Alex (to Daddy): Oh, Claire ran away. She --
(Claire runs around squealing.)
Alex: You want your breakfast?
Claire: No. No.
Alex: Go get it then. At Chick Fil-A. Go get Chick Fil-A for your breakfast.
Alex: I -- Claire, can I tell you something? Claire?
Claire: What?
Alex: When you go to Chick Fil-A, go, and get breakfast at Chick Fil-A, okay?
Claire: Okay.
Claire: Bye! I'm going to Chick Fil-A!
(Claire runs around downstairs.)
Alex: Be back home! Claire, come back home!
Claire: I didn't go to Chick Fil-A yet!
(Alex runs over.)
Alex: I'm coming too!
Claire: Don't come!
Claire (talking quietly to the kitchen table): Um, I need chicken nuggets, french fries, and water.
(Alex runs over to the kitchen table.)
Alex: I'm getting it!
Claire (running off): I ate it! I ate it all up!
Alex (to the kitchen table): I'm getting chicken nuggets, french fries, and water. Yum yum. I ate it.
Claire (laughing): I ate it. I ate all your food.
Alex: I ate all your food!



(dinner)
Claire: Mommy, after we go to bedtime, is it gonna be Saturday?
Mommy: It's gonna be Wednesday.
Alex: It's gonna be Cleanseday. Claire's looking forward to Saturday because we're going to the beach house.