Thanks for meeting me, sir.

Claire: Uh pull-up.


Claire: Boo. Orange. Orange.
Daddy: It’s yellow.
Claire: Yellow.


(breakfast time)

Daddy (showing Claire a strawberry): What’s this, Claire?
Claire: Strawberry.
Daddy: Strawberry.
Daddy (showing Claire some Cheerios): But what’s this? What’s this, Claire?
Claire: Chah-wohs.

Claire: Mah.
Daddy: Did you kiss your, um, banana?
Mommy: She did.
Alex: I’m kissin’ my milk.
Alex: Can you kiss your, um, crayon, Daddy? Can you kiss your pencil? Is it a pencil?
Daddy: Yeah it is.
Alex: Can you kiss it?
(Daddy kisses it.)
Alex: Can you kiss the Cheerios, Mommy?

Alex: I would like different food, okay?
Mommy: Okay, do you have any ideas?
Alex: I would like…
Claire: ‘Nanas!


(snack time)

Alex: Can I see Alex eating his snack?
Daddy (at his laptop): I don't have that on here.
Alex: Why?
Claire: Mommy 'puter on.
Daddy: That's right!

(Daddy is asking Alex lots of annoying questions.)
Alex (to Daddy): Let's not talk about that anymore, because I wanna have time to play.


Daddy: Alex, if there are three monkeys in a tree, and one of them is eating apples, how many monkeys are in the tree?
(Pause.)
Alex: One.
Daddy: Just one? I thought there were three. What happened to the other two?
(Pause.)
Daddy: What are the other two monkeys doing?
Alex: They went home.


(dinner time)

Claire: Ah more. Peeze.
Claire: Ah more. Dinner.
Daddy: What do you want more of?
Claire: Ah more. Duh-nuh!

Alex: Why do you have, um, water on my carrots?

Mommy (to Claire): I want you to eat some carrots, please.
Alex (to no one in particular): I want you to eat some carrots, please.
(Alex smiles.)

(Claire hands Alex a carrot.)
Alex: No. Don't share, okay? You eat your own dinner.

(Mommy and Claire went upstairs for bath, while Alex finishes his dinner.)
Alex: Oh, they're doing bath now.
Daddy: Yeah, it sounds like they're running the bath.
Alex: We're not winn-ding.
Daddy: We're not what?
Alex: We're not winning. We have to hurry.


(bath time)

(For no apparent reason, Alex shakes Daddy’s hand.)
Alex: Thanks for meeting me, sir.

Alex (playing): What in the world?

Alex: I hear a noise so I'm gonna find out where it’s coming from.